Reflections on Training

Once we got all the technical details out of the way (such as where to document calls and emails and where to find certain forms), we turned to the more engaging topic of how to get the most out of phone calls with clients and potential clients.

I particularly enjoyed the discussion on reflective listening and reframing. Reflective listening is an important skill because it lets the person you are talking to feel as though you are actually interested in their feelings and what they have to say and that you understand what they are saying. More specifically, it’s important to engage skills such as paraphrasing and summarizing. This can not only demonstrate concern and understanding but also build trust. In addition, asking open-ended questions is a good way to explore issues and provide information rather than just getting “yes” or “no” answers. However, reflective listening doesn’t involve taking sides or agreeing, but instead remaining impartial and reflecting and acknowledging the person’s feelings.

Reframing is equally important because it can change how a person conceptualizes or sees a particular situation. Reframing can also be done through paraphrasing but more specifically it involves pinpointing the issues that are important to the person you are speaking with. Rather than focusing on emotions, which might preclude agreement, the goal is to figure out which values and issues are important to the parties involved. Once this is done, it may be easier to identify underlying needs and find a common ground.

Our training was also very valuable because it affirmed that ultimately our task at CoRe is not to tell anyone what to do or to force anyone into an agreement. Both parties have to agree to the final solution. This is one of the many advantages to mediation as opposed to a court setting where the parties would be bound to the ruling regardless of whether or not they agreed to the terms.

Here's a shot from the training session. Listening intently!